Preparing for Disappointment 

It's easy for coaches to look at all of the highlights of their team. It's not so easy; however, for coaches to look at the lowlights of their team. The reason for the latter is because this requires coaches to come to the realization of where their team lacks. This also means that coaches need to assess the weak areas of their team. It's not always easy, to be truthful. This causes coaches to look at their team and admit where they haven't done as good as they had hoped. And, in many cases, this does fall back on the coach as his/her fault - and even if it isn't their fault, they are expected to take the blame anyhow.

The fact of the matter is that at some point during any given season, teams will encounter disappointment. Those who set unrealistic and super high expectations are the folks who get let down the hardest when disappointment happens. It's so important, as coaches, that before the season even gets underway, that we prepare our teams for disappointment. It's reality and it's a part of sports. No team, player, organization or coach is perfect. So, in some capacity, we must accept and expect to be disappointed at one point or another.

It comes as no surprise that disappointment isn't always easy to accept. This is because there is a point of recognition that failure has occurred. Maybe it was a loss, maybe it was a poor performance, maybe it was not executing a game plan - The list is long. The point here is that when one doesn't expect to be disappointed, then when disappointment inevitably happens, it becomes a total shocker. It's vital as coaches that we prepare our players and have them expect the worst and hope for the best. If our players have great faith in their preparations and are willing to encounter disappointment face-to-face, then it's really hard to fail.

Games are not won by coaches, but they certainly can be lost by coaches. It's the coaches job to prepare and guide players to success. A part of that responsibility is coaches helping kids deal with disappointment before it even happens. This is where the post-game, post-practice, pre-season, and team meeting coaching messages come through. Coaches need to have a strong voice that carries and sends an infectious message. Without solid preparation, coaches will never be able to prepare their team for disappointment in the event that it does occur. More than this, coaches too will not be able to handle disappointment well if they never talk about it.

We, as coaches, must address reality. In sports, there are those who win and those who lose - No argument. That being said, we need to acknowledge that both exist. Sure, we want to be on the winning side - This, in large part, is why we participate in sports. But, losing is a reality that everyone has faced. When we are prepared to be disappointed, we will become hungrier to win. Being disappointed is not a feeling that we want to have, but it's a feeling that we will inevitably encounter at some point in our careers. The more prepared we are to see disappointment, stare it down, and overcome it - The better off we will all be.

Coaches, prepare your team for disappointment as it happens both on and off the surface of play. If we wish to be mentors, teachers, and role models for our players, then we must prepare them for what is real and true.